Mixed Vegetable Soup – Scene 10 Part II
Mixed Vegetable Soup laughed at him.
‘You are going to kill me with voodoo! Ha, ha! Ran out of Chinese techniques?’
‘This is not to kill you my dear pseudo-Chinese with cello tape on your temples! This is to heal myself. It is called Voodoo Ward’
Mixed Vegetable Soup was puzzled. He had never heard of such a technique. But he continued with his attack. He blocked his nostrils with the index finger and thumb of his left hand, turned back, bended forward, hitched his skirt and let out a radioactive fart.
The fart raced ahead, fell on Great Ball of China, behaved like a psychopathic carcinogen and gave Great Ball of China blood, lung, brain and tissue cancers.
But Great Ball of China was not standing idle all along. He had plucked a few strands of his hair and tied it to the doll. As soon as the radioactive fart gave him all sorts of cancers, he rapidly pinned the doll with a couple of pins along its length. The cancer was immediately cured. His technique was based on two principles. The African Voodoo and Chinese Acupuncture. The voodoo doll linked to his life force while the pins pierced at critical acupuncture points acted on the life force and cured its maladies. With quick stabs Great Ball of China also cured his Malaria and TB.
Mixed Vegetable Soup was dumbfounded. He began to throw disease after disease at Great Ball of China in a mad frenzy. He threw Albinism. Alzheimer’s disease, Asthma, Cardiac Arrest, Cholera, Chicken Pox, Small Pox, Dermatitis, E.Coli, Hepatitis, Jaundice, Leprosy, Measles, Parkinson’s Disease, Rickets, Scabies, Typhoid, Whooping Cough and every other disease he could think of. But Great Ball of China warded or cured all diseases with a few quick stabs on his doll. Mixed Vegetable Soup grew angry and distracted. He began to fear he may not be able to fulfill his vow after all.
Finally he decided to use his last disease. He stood on his heels, slapped his bums, took out a condom, tore it to pieces, threw them in the air, cupped his mouth and let out an Indian scream rolling his tongue over his teeth. The air flew out in a ball and knocked down a cluster of Human Immuno Deficiency Virus. The HIV cluster got really angry and attacked Great Ball of China and ate all his white blood cells.
Immediately Great Ball of China knew he was dying. He knew there was no cure for AIDS and he decided to escape from the place. He took a leap and flew into the air. But Mixed Vegetable Soup also knew the old Chinese technique of flying. He began to chase Great Ball of China. So the People’s Republic of China was suddenly surprised to find a bunch of idiots flying across the air as it there was no gravity in China to pull them down. They skirted treetops, buildings and monuments in slow motion. The crossed the Great Wall of China where they stopped a moment to catch their breath.
A Great Ball on a Great Wall thought Great Ball of China and then took off.
To be continued tomorrow…..